Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Chuck Norris Quotes

It's been awhile. I thought I'd share some of my favorite Chuck Norris Quotes that I stumbled upon recently.

• M.C. Hammer learned the hard way that Chuck Norris can touch this.

• Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.

• In 1991, Chuck Norris shot a 14 on an 18 hole golf course, falling short of his personal best by 2 strokes.

• Superman owns a pair of Chuck Norris pajamas.

• Giraffes were created when Chuck Norris uppercutted a horse.

• Chuck Norris can slam revolving doors.

• Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.

• Chuck Norris can delete the Windows Recycling Bin.

• Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Chuck Norris.

• Chuck Norris can speak braille.

• Chuck Norris can blow bubbles with beef jerky.

• Chuck Norris and lead a horse to water...aaaand make it drink.

• Chuck Norris can play Twister with himself...and win.

An my favorite:

• If you spell Chuck Norris wrong on Google it doesn't say, "Did you mean Chuck Norris?" It simply replies, "Run while you still have the chance."

Thursday, January 6, 2011

You just got Ninja'd

Notice the way he kicks the "B" to keep it from falling.

Sweet Action.

Holla!!!

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Wal-Mart: The Right Price...at what price?

Let me start this post by saying that I am a Wal-Mart shopper. Its convenient, I can trust that they'll have almost anything I'm looking for, and let's face it they're cheap. My budget needs Wal-Mart. I still remember the name of the greeter at the store in Farmington, NM. His name was James and my family always felt like we were expected. He knew our names and we knew his.

Wal-Mart, as we all know, is stupid huge. They're everywhere. Try going on a road trip and not find one in a city over 5,000 population. You'll find 'em, but its rare. That being said shouldn't they be the leaders in convenience? They are a bloated convenience store as it is. Shouldn't they make all the little convenience stores want to grow up to be them?

What I'm about to say is not isolated to Wal-Mart, but I pick on them because I think they should get it right. Watch this post and you'll get where I'm coming from.
1> The receipts!
The blasted receipts!!! My wife and I may be the last people on the planet that keeps their receipts, but for Pete's sake what's with the scroll of parchment!? Do I look like Harry Potter with a feather pin and ink jar?
Now I get what they're trying to do with the extra six inches of paper attached to my receipt, but guess what? No one wants that. Again, if we're the last couple on the planet keeping receipts think about how much paper is being wasted. I rip off the extra every time and throw it away.

If the scroll is going to continue let's get toothpicks at each register so that I can reel it up proper. I digress. Honestly if it is going to continue, which I think it is, let's get something useful on there. Does anyone remember Coke and Sprite's "win 1 in every 6 bottle tops" campaign? That was amazing! I never bought so much soda. Not only the hope of getting something for free, but I knew people that won and I won a few times myself. If that's what Wal-Mart, Kroger, etc are going for...I hate to break it to ya, but huh uh. Not happening.

Why not collect 5 of these and get a free box of whatever is new like a new Cheerio's spin off, or even something old.

"Collect 5 and get 2 lbs of bananas for free"

We all know we need banana's, but we don't eat enough...or any. Being reminded to eat them, but for free could encourage more banana buying, which could lead to more fruit eating, which could lead...oh you get the point. There are possibilities.

2> The credit card terminal!
I've swiped a debit or credit card a few thousand times in my life, and yet there are still occasions when I have to ask myself, "Do I press CANCEL for credit?" And I ALWAYS ask myself, "Shouldn't there just be a CREDIT key?"

Is there a mandate out there that every credit card terminal is not allowed to have the word Credit so that we subliminally want to choose Debit? Is Debit cheaper on the store than Credit? There's nothing like a disgusted look from a cashier because you are having the internal dialog of logic vs. reality.

I realize both of these things are petty, but I think of them for one reason or another everytime I'm in a Wal-Mart, Kroger, or any store with receipts and credit card terminals. Which by the way is most every store. I fear that someone said this is the way it should be done and no one spoke up after they realized it was broken.

What little things do you still have broken that could easily be fixed?

Holla!!!

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Design your own Flip Mino Camcorder


If you are reading this blog go to the following site to create your own or check mine out here. Even if you don't buy one today MAN you'll have fun just creating one. The flash on the sight is brilliant.

You can also put your own picture on the camera or choose from a "go-zillion" different designs.

Flip, in the words of the luggage sales man from Joe vs. the Volcano (one of my favorite movies) "May you live to be a thousand years old."

Holla!!!

Monday, January 5, 2009

This little piggy went Wii, Wii, Wii all the way home...

I don't know whether to laugh or to cry. But I know this, this video will change you. How it changes you I don't know, but I'd love to hear what you think.

Holla!!!

Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Subway Rockstars!!!

If you are ever in Nashville and you happen to accidentally stumble upon the Subway restaurant in Elm Hill Pike go in. Even if you just ate, go buy a cookie or a soda and let them take care of you. I work two minutes from the location and I usually bring my own lunch, but I've been twice now and I enjoyed my experience so much I wrote in to Subway to let them know.
I use to work in Customer Service and good feedback only encourages and energizes good performance. I recommend whether you have a good or bad experience to give that feedback. You make them even better and sometimes especially with bad news. I will say if you give bad feedback, do it graciously and diplomatically. You never know how you would act in their shoes.

Holla!!!

Here is the letter I wrote:
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Hooray!

I have now been to this location twice. The first time I noticed the good service and passed it off as the workers just having a good day. Now that I have gone twice I can tell that the management is doing something very very right.

I realize that my prejudice about the location does bear some weight on my feelings, but these workers outshine almost any waiter or waitress working for a tip. Its unfortunate that a smile, looking someone in the eye, and well wishing would stand out, but they do.

Not only were they the example, but in my opinion they are the standard. The manager deserves credit for obviously creating a good atmosphere, but also for hiring people that will uphold that atmosphere.

Thanks for your time.

Jerad Burkhart
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Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Responsability a.k.a. Response-ability


Well, its been a month since I've last posted. We'll see how this thang evolves. My wife's boss sent the following group of words out to her company from an unknown source. I was inspired, or better said, I was gladly reminded. I hope you are too!

Holla!!!
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Ok, it's official. We're in a recession. We hear it everywhere. The question is, "What do
we do?" I can tell you what most people are going to do. They are going to live and
respond by fear, which means they are going to be left out of the recovery that always
follows a recession.

So here's what I want to do; give you the six very best abilities that you can have during
a recession, plus one, so you can start getting ahead of the crowd before the recovery.
Here they are:


1. Ability number one is Likeability. If you haven't figured it out yet, you can be the
smartest guy in the room. You can have great ideas. But if nobody likes you, no one's
going to adopt your ideas, and nothing you want is going to get done. Even in today's
market, people are selective about who they do business with. If you don't have
likeability, you're going to be out in the cold.

2. The second best ability is Adaptability. Again, we're in a recession, which means the
rules are changing. I think we're in a global transformation, or transition between old,
corrupt, and sick systems, to new, more entrepreneurial, capitalistic-based. All that
simply means is, you have to be adaptable. It's not going to be "business as usual." If you
can't roll with the punches, roll up your sleeves, you're going to be left out.

3. Ability number three is Teachability. You're going to have learn how to do new things
like how to put up web sites and use technology and the internet. If you're not teachable,
then you're going to be working at the drive-thru window at McDonald's.

4. The next best ability is Dependability. You show up and do what you say you will do.
Here's a hint. During these down times, make sure you cover the small bases. Be on time.
If you have a meeting at 8:30, be there at 8:20. Be dependable. Do what you say, when
you say you will do it. People have a long memory when it comes to this kind of stuff.

5. Ability number five is Reliability. This differs from the previous in that we're talking
here not about your character, but about your work. Make sure people know you do great
work, that you take pride in what you do, you strive for excellence, that your work is
always done right, and they can rely on it.

6. The sixth best ability is Humility. We're living in a day when people aren't impressed
with your limousine and all your luxury items. They are not impressed with titles,
accomplishments, and corner offices. They're looking for people with genuine humility.
These are the people who are not impressed with themselves, but who are all about the
task. This is the attitude that says, "It's not about me; it's about you." If you really,
genuinely want to help people, it will come through in sense of humility.

7. And the 6 + 1 best ability that trumps all the other abilities is Responsibility. Here I am
not talking about reliability, or humility. I'm talking about response-ability. Take that
word apart. You have the ability to respond. This trumps all the other abilities. Listen to
what I am saying. Because we live in a reactionary time, that's the worst possible thing
you can do. What do you hear every single day? These four things repeated in their
variations: We've got to hunker down, cut back, sell short, and wait it out. Those are all
reactive responses motivated by fear.

If you're going to be a part of the recovery that's coming, the new world that's being
created, you have to learn how to be proactive and take initiative based on faith, vision,
energy, enthusiasm, and the common good. Nothing else will be tolerated.